This week's topic at The Broke and the Bookish is "Top Ten Hyped Books We've Never Read". It's hard for me to do this category because I'm not a hype kind of person. I tend to read a lot of classics and older books rather than jumping on too many bandwagons; still, there are books that are hard to avoid if you follow the blogging community, so here are some books that would fall into this category:
Books with General Hype:
1. Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert: I generally dislike the whole genre of "I did this thing and found some kind of enlightenment and let me write a book about it." I didn't particularly like Wild (I know, I know), and I have the feeling I won't like Eat Pray Love. If I do end up reading it one day, I'll just focus on the eating part. ;)
2. Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg: Yeah, I know I should thinking about developing in my career and all that, but I like to read books that bear little resemblance to actual life.
3. Bossypants by Tina Fey: Everyone seems to like this book, and I probably would too, but I tend to only read biographies of dead people.
4. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon: I hear about this all the time, especially now with the television show, but it's a huge time commitment. Maybe one day....
5. A Song of Ice and Fire series by George R. R. Martin: See above.
6. Captivating by Stasi Eldridge: I really wanted to like this book because it was soooooo hyped in the Christian community for a while and most of my friends were raving about it. I have never managed to get past the first chapter. I remember having a great bonding moment with a friend when we realized that neither of us could get through Captivating.
Books With Blogging Hype:
7. The Book Thief by Markus Zusak: It's on my list, I swear!
8. Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins: So many bloggers seem to think this book is the bees knees. It doesn't seem to be my kind of thing, but I won't rule out reading it one of these days.
9. The Selection by Keira Cass: I hear about this book all the time and it seems you either love it or hate it.
10. Ready Player One by Ernest Cline: I've been hearing a lot about this book lately and I'm not sure if I'd like it. Anyone want to convince me? ;)
What about you, readers? What hyped books have you never read?
Tuesday, 7 July 2015
Friday, 3 July 2015
Not Today
In mid-July of 2013, Gill and I started our journey to become parents. Without going into too much unnecessary detail, today it became clear that two years have gone by without a pregnancy. I have a myriad of thoughts about this depressing anniversary, which I'll be sharing later on when I've processed things a little more, but today, I am sad. Today, I am grieving. Today, I will let myself feel the heartache that is overwhelming, in hopes that tomorrow I can find that sliver of hope to keep going. If you happen to know me in 'real life', I could use a hug.
Tuesday, 30 June 2015
Top Ten Tuesday: Favourite Reads From 2015 (So Far)
This week's topic at The Broke and the Bookish is the best books read so far this year. Here is my list:
1. Maus by Art Spiegelman: I mostly read this because I'm taking a course on graphic novels, but I loved it. There are so many layers here in Spiegelman's account of his father's experience of WWII and the Holocaust.
2. He Knew He Was Right by Anthony Trollope: To be honest, I didn't know if I would like this book about a man's excessive jealousy. I think if it were only about jealous Louis Trevelyan, I would have gotten tired of the book, but the sub-plots and cast of characters kept me engaged.
3. Breaking the Tongue by Vyvyane Loh: A novel about World War II in Singapore.
4. The Orenda by Joseph Boyden: I've been putting this on a lot of lists lately because it's just so good. It takes a new look on Canada's History and despite the violence, I loved this novel.
5. Three Day Road by Joseph Boyden: Yeah, he's a new favourite of mine. This novel deals with two young Cree men and their experience as snipers in World War One.
6. Oblomov by Ivan Goncharov: As a Russophile, I really should have read this ages ago, but I finally picked it up this year and loved it. Poor, lazy Oblomov!
7. Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel: Despite it's length, I plowed through this book quickly as I just couldn't put it down. I can't wait to read Bring Up the Bodies.
8. Villette by Charlotte Brontë: A young teacher moves to France to teach in a girls' school. I really enjoyed reading about her experiences and emotions.
9. Us Conductors by Sean Michaels: Bonus points for the fact that shortly after I read this book, he came and spoke at a library near me so I got my book signed!
10. Russian Winter by Daphne Kalotay: There are so many things going on in this story: Intrigue, distrust, jealousy, love. I really enjoyed it.
1. Maus by Art Spiegelman: I mostly read this because I'm taking a course on graphic novels, but I loved it. There are so many layers here in Spiegelman's account of his father's experience of WWII and the Holocaust.
2. He Knew He Was Right by Anthony Trollope: To be honest, I didn't know if I would like this book about a man's excessive jealousy. I think if it were only about jealous Louis Trevelyan, I would have gotten tired of the book, but the sub-plots and cast of characters kept me engaged.
3. Breaking the Tongue by Vyvyane Loh: A novel about World War II in Singapore.
4. The Orenda by Joseph Boyden: I've been putting this on a lot of lists lately because it's just so good. It takes a new look on Canada's History and despite the violence, I loved this novel.
5. Three Day Road by Joseph Boyden: Yeah, he's a new favourite of mine. This novel deals with two young Cree men and their experience as snipers in World War One.
6. Oblomov by Ivan Goncharov: As a Russophile, I really should have read this ages ago, but I finally picked it up this year and loved it. Poor, lazy Oblomov!
7. Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel: Despite it's length, I plowed through this book quickly as I just couldn't put it down. I can't wait to read Bring Up the Bodies.
8. Villette by Charlotte Brontë: A young teacher moves to France to teach in a girls' school. I really enjoyed reading about her experiences and emotions.
9. Us Conductors by Sean Michaels: Bonus points for the fact that shortly after I read this book, he came and spoke at a library near me so I got my book signed!
10. Russian Winter by Daphne Kalotay: There are so many things going on in this story: Intrigue, distrust, jealousy, love. I really enjoyed it.
Tuesday, 16 June 2015
Top Ten Tuesday: Summer TBR List
Is it almost summer already? It feels like spring has gone by so quickly! This week at The Broke and the Bookish, we're blogging about the books we plan to read this summer, so here goes:
1. Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas: This book has been on the list for a looooong time, so I am stoked to finally read it.
2. Petersburg by Andrei Bely: To continue on the Russian theme that I've had going this past year. This book is high on the list as I've been nostalgic for my days in St. Petersburg lately.
3. Russian Winter by Daphne Kalotay: See above. I'm always on the lookout for contemporary books that cover Russian well.
4. The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley: Last year I read The Once and Future King, so it seems time for another version of the Arthurian legends. I bought this book last fall at a used book sale, so I'm looking forward to having a chance to read it.
5. Nicholas and Alexandra by Robert K. Massie: To finish off the trilogy of biographies of Romanov tsars.
6. Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks: Just because it looks interesting and it's on a few of those lists of books you should read before you die.
7. The Case of Comrade Tulayev by Victor Serge: I read about this book in Martin Sixsmith's history of Russia and it seemed right up my alley, as I'm somewhat fascinated by the Stalinist purges of the 1930s.
8. American Gods by Neil Gaiman: I keep hearing about he's amazing. I've read one of his books, but this is supposed to be a magnum opus, so I hope to enjoy it.
9. The Book of Life by Deborah Harkness: I've been slowly making my way through her trilogy, and plan to enjoy this book in mid-August when my summer courses are done.
10. The Jefferson Rule: How the Founding Fathers Became Infallible and Our Politics Inflexible by David Sehat: A friend in an online political events group mentioned this book, and a few of us thought it would be interesting to read over the summer and check back to discuss.
It was hard to narrow down this time, you guys! I think it's because I got a tablet and the Overdrive app, so now I want to read allllll the books I can find. Happy reading!
1. Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas: This book has been on the list for a looooong time, so I am stoked to finally read it.
2. Petersburg by Andrei Bely: To continue on the Russian theme that I've had going this past year. This book is high on the list as I've been nostalgic for my days in St. Petersburg lately.
3. Russian Winter by Daphne Kalotay: See above. I'm always on the lookout for contemporary books that cover Russian well.
4. The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley: Last year I read The Once and Future King, so it seems time for another version of the Arthurian legends. I bought this book last fall at a used book sale, so I'm looking forward to having a chance to read it.
5. Nicholas and Alexandra by Robert K. Massie: To finish off the trilogy of biographies of Romanov tsars.
6. Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks: Just because it looks interesting and it's on a few of those lists of books you should read before you die.
7. The Case of Comrade Tulayev by Victor Serge: I read about this book in Martin Sixsmith's history of Russia and it seemed right up my alley, as I'm somewhat fascinated by the Stalinist purges of the 1930s.
8. American Gods by Neil Gaiman: I keep hearing about he's amazing. I've read one of his books, but this is supposed to be a magnum opus, so I hope to enjoy it.
9. The Book of Life by Deborah Harkness: I've been slowly making my way through her trilogy, and plan to enjoy this book in mid-August when my summer courses are done.
10. The Jefferson Rule: How the Founding Fathers Became Infallible and Our Politics Inflexible by David Sehat: A friend in an online political events group mentioned this book, and a few of us thought it would be interesting to read over the summer and check back to discuss.
It was hard to narrow down this time, you guys! I think it's because I got a tablet and the Overdrive app, so now I want to read allllll the books I can find. Happy reading!
Tuesday, 26 May 2015
Advocating for the Infertile: Are Infertile People "Oversensitive"?
I've noticed something lately. I'm not sure if it's isolated, or a trend, or what. On the one hand, I've noticed people trying to be honest and speak up about infertility, miscarriage, and child loss. On the other hand, I've noticed some of these postings and honest confessions meet a host of negativity, criticism, and accusations of "oversensitivity". "You're just sensitive" is something thrown around a lot, often in ways that simply leave a bad taste in one's mouth, and frankly, it seems to be used on the Internet a lot as a way to say, "I see your opinion, but I'm going to ignore it and keep doing this anyway."
I've definitely seen this attitude as a response to infertility. From posts noting that fake pregnancy announcements can be hurtful to addressing the church's handling of Mother's Day, for every two people that find these helpful, there seems to be at least one nay-sayer. Paraphrased comments seem to say lots of the following:
So, am I just oversensitive, and should I just 'get over it'? Well, the answer is YES, I'm sensitive. I don't like the term "oversensitive", as it implies that there is some kind of a scale that determines who is allowed to be upset by events, and to what degree, but I will admit to being sensitive. Sorry guys, but I am. In fact, we all are. When we go through a crisis, it affects the way we view our lives and others. Prolonged infertility is a personal crisis and a constant grieving process. There is not a moment of the day when my infertility and longing to become a mother are not somewhere in the back of my consciousness. It's ridiculous to ask me to put those feelings in a box and not be affected by them, just as it's ridiculous to ask that a person undergoing a health crisis should just "forget about it" for a while. So how should I deal with this, and how should my loved ones and my church?
Those going through infertility need to recognize their sensitivity... and be okay with it: Accepting that it's okay to be sad has been very difficult for me. It's so easy to feel guilty about it, because shouldn't I be glad about my loving husband, my wonderful house, my collection of quirky but loveable family members and friends? It's taken a long time to be understand that I can be happy about those things, but at the same time profoundly sad for something that is devastating to me. That said, it is my responsibility to manage my sensitivity. That may mean that I avoid occasions where I know I can't keep it together. It may mean doing what I can to deal with my emotions, whether that is therapy or exercise or binge-watching crappy television. I need to be the first person to take care of myself, and I also need to understand that people WILL say things that hurt, often unknowingly, and to learn how to deal with it without punching them in the face.
Those with friends who are / may be going through infertility need to recognize their friends' sensitivity... and deal with it: Why? Because that's what friends do. We've ALL got stuff we're sensitive about. It may be our parents, our bodies, our health, our food issues, our weird phobias, etc. You may think these are legitimate concerns, or you may think they're ridiculous, but if you want to be friends with that person, you accept that s/he has flaws, sensitivities, and quirks, and you decide to deal with it. Some of these sensitivities may be temporary, like a job loss, and some may be lifelong struggles. You can choose to drop your friends because they don't make enough money to have the same lifestyle as you, or you can choose to go to a restaurant where the prices are lower. (Yes, shameless Friends reference.) You can choose to have vegetarian dishes available when your non-meat eating friends come for dinner, because even if *you* have no interest in giving up meat, you value these friends enough to cater to their decisions. Likewise, you can choose to say your infertile friend can suck it up if she doesn't like your "hilarious" April fool's day prank,** or you can handle pregnancy and children with sensitivity (note that I say sensitivity, not that you stop talking about it at all). This applies in person and on social media. Like it or not, we have people on our friends list going through a myriad of personal issues, some of which we know about, and others we do not. We don't have to censor ourselves constantly, but it behooves us all to stop and think about what we post from time to time. I myself frequently think of something that sounds hilarious at the moment, only to realize a few minutes later that it's actually mean-spirited or bratty or just plain not that funny.
More than anything, I think we need to give grace to the "sensitive". You know what they say about walking a mile in someone's shoes. Who's to say that it won't be you next who has a deep personal issue that causes you to well up with tears or want to hide from the world? If we walk around with the attitude that anyone who doesn't like what we say can just suck it up, we may end up with a lot of pride, but not a lot of friends.
ETA: I'm linking this post up with Amateur Nester's Tuesday link-up. Check out her post and some other great blogs as well.
*I think this is a pretty ridiculous argument. First of all, we ALL have birthdays, whereas we are not all able to become parents. It might be John's birthday today and not mine, but at some point it will be my birthday and not John's. Also, I've never known a church to ask all people with a birthday to stand and be celebrated. It will be Mother's Day once a year, but I've yet to see Hallmark have a "Let's celebrate and love women (and men) who contribute yet are not parents" day...
**Does anyone actually think fake pregnancy announcements are hilarious? Even before infertility, I found them pretty lame. What's fun about getting people excited, and then telling them you're lying?
I've definitely seen this attitude as a response to infertility. From posts noting that fake pregnancy announcements can be hurtful to addressing the church's handling of Mother's Day, for every two people that find these helpful, there seems to be at least one nay-sayer. Paraphrased comments seem to say lots of the following:
- The world does not revolve around you.
- You should stop being jealous and celebrate those around you.
- Should we stop posting about birthdays because it isn't someone else's birthday.*
- You should get off social media / not go to church if it hurts.
So, am I just oversensitive, and should I just 'get over it'? Well, the answer is YES, I'm sensitive. I don't like the term "oversensitive", as it implies that there is some kind of a scale that determines who is allowed to be upset by events, and to what degree, but I will admit to being sensitive. Sorry guys, but I am. In fact, we all are. When we go through a crisis, it affects the way we view our lives and others. Prolonged infertility is a personal crisis and a constant grieving process. There is not a moment of the day when my infertility and longing to become a mother are not somewhere in the back of my consciousness. It's ridiculous to ask me to put those feelings in a box and not be affected by them, just as it's ridiculous to ask that a person undergoing a health crisis should just "forget about it" for a while. So how should I deal with this, and how should my loved ones and my church?
Those going through infertility need to recognize their sensitivity... and be okay with it: Accepting that it's okay to be sad has been very difficult for me. It's so easy to feel guilty about it, because shouldn't I be glad about my loving husband, my wonderful house, my collection of quirky but loveable family members and friends? It's taken a long time to be understand that I can be happy about those things, but at the same time profoundly sad for something that is devastating to me. That said, it is my responsibility to manage my sensitivity. That may mean that I avoid occasions where I know I can't keep it together. It may mean doing what I can to deal with my emotions, whether that is therapy or exercise or binge-watching crappy television. I need to be the first person to take care of myself, and I also need to understand that people WILL say things that hurt, often unknowingly, and to learn how to deal with it without punching them in the face.
 |
| No, really. Try not to slap people. (Source: Here) |
Those with friends who are / may be going through infertility need to recognize their friends' sensitivity... and deal with it: Why? Because that's what friends do. We've ALL got stuff we're sensitive about. It may be our parents, our bodies, our health, our food issues, our weird phobias, etc. You may think these are legitimate concerns, or you may think they're ridiculous, but if you want to be friends with that person, you accept that s/he has flaws, sensitivities, and quirks, and you decide to deal with it. Some of these sensitivities may be temporary, like a job loss, and some may be lifelong struggles. You can choose to drop your friends because they don't make enough money to have the same lifestyle as you, or you can choose to go to a restaurant where the prices are lower. (Yes, shameless Friends reference.) You can choose to have vegetarian dishes available when your non-meat eating friends come for dinner, because even if *you* have no interest in giving up meat, you value these friends enough to cater to their decisions. Likewise, you can choose to say your infertile friend can suck it up if she doesn't like your "hilarious" April fool's day prank,** or you can handle pregnancy and children with sensitivity (note that I say sensitivity, not that you stop talking about it at all). This applies in person and on social media. Like it or not, we have people on our friends list going through a myriad of personal issues, some of which we know about, and others we do not. We don't have to censor ourselves constantly, but it behooves us all to stop and think about what we post from time to time. I myself frequently think of something that sounds hilarious at the moment, only to realize a few minutes later that it's actually mean-spirited or bratty or just plain not that funny.
More than anything, I think we need to give grace to the "sensitive". You know what they say about walking a mile in someone's shoes. Who's to say that it won't be you next who has a deep personal issue that causes you to well up with tears or want to hide from the world? If we walk around with the attitude that anyone who doesn't like what we say can just suck it up, we may end up with a lot of pride, but not a lot of friends.
ETA: I'm linking this post up with Amateur Nester's Tuesday link-up. Check out her post and some other great blogs as well.
*I think this is a pretty ridiculous argument. First of all, we ALL have birthdays, whereas we are not all able to become parents. It might be John's birthday today and not mine, but at some point it will be my birthday and not John's. Also, I've never known a church to ask all people with a birthday to stand and be celebrated. It will be Mother's Day once a year, but I've yet to see Hallmark have a "Let's celebrate and love women (and men) who contribute yet are not parents" day...
**Does anyone actually think fake pregnancy announcements are hilarious? Even before infertility, I found them pretty lame. What's fun about getting people excited, and then telling them you're lying?
Tuesday, 19 May 2015
Top Ten Tuesday: 10 Books to Take You To a Foreign Land
Today's Top Ten Tuesday topic is a freebie, meaning we get to choose whatever we want. Since summer is close upon us here in Canada, all our thoughts start going to travel. I was bitten by the travel bug as a young kid, and it doesn't take much to make me want to high-tail it out of town on a new adventure. Here are ten books to read to take you far away into a new and exciting culture. I've tried to mix things up and not use the same location more than once (except I've Italy in there twice because, well, it's Italy).
1. All Good Things by Sarah Turnbull: This a memoir of the author's time in Tahiti. I think we can all agree that a vacation in Tahiti is always in order!
2. A Room With a View by E.M. Forster: A jaunt around Italy would be pretty sweet right about now.
3. A Town Like Alice by Nevil Shute: From the jungles of Malaysia to small-town Australia, this book takes you on a long journey from the comfort of your living room.
4. Beautiful Ruins by Jess Walter: This novel goes back and forth between modern-day Los Angeles and a small Italian coastal village.
5. A Year in Provence by Peter Mayle: I read this ages and ages ago, but this account of the author's time in southern France is hilarious and makes you feel like you're experiencing it first-hand.
6. Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K. Jerome: I suppose England isn't a foreign land for everyone, but Victorian England sure is. Enjoy this light-hearted account of a journey down the Thames.
7. State of Wonder by Ann Patchett: Take a trip into the Brazilian rainforest without leaving your house.
8. The Garden of Evening Mists by Tan Twan Eng: This has been on a lot of my lists because it's just that good. It's a fairly heavy read dealing with historical memory and World War II, but it also takes you into the highlands of Malaysia.
9. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden: I picked this up out of curiosity when my mom was reading it, and honestly could not put it down. If you're interested in historical Japan, this is a must-read book.
10. The Winter Palace by Eva Stachniak: In truth, I didn't love this book, but it's a great introduction to Russian History for those who, unlike me, aren't addicted to historical biographies.
So where you will travel this summer, either by book or by road.... or even by map? ;)
 |
| Source is here. |
1. All Good Things by Sarah Turnbull: This a memoir of the author's time in Tahiti. I think we can all agree that a vacation in Tahiti is always in order!
2. A Room With a View by E.M. Forster: A jaunt around Italy would be pretty sweet right about now.
3. A Town Like Alice by Nevil Shute: From the jungles of Malaysia to small-town Australia, this book takes you on a long journey from the comfort of your living room.
4. Beautiful Ruins by Jess Walter: This novel goes back and forth between modern-day Los Angeles and a small Italian coastal village.
5. A Year in Provence by Peter Mayle: I read this ages and ages ago, but this account of the author's time in southern France is hilarious and makes you feel like you're experiencing it first-hand.
6. Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K. Jerome: I suppose England isn't a foreign land for everyone, but Victorian England sure is. Enjoy this light-hearted account of a journey down the Thames.
7. State of Wonder by Ann Patchett: Take a trip into the Brazilian rainforest without leaving your house.
8. The Garden of Evening Mists by Tan Twan Eng: This has been on a lot of my lists because it's just that good. It's a fairly heavy read dealing with historical memory and World War II, but it also takes you into the highlands of Malaysia.
9. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden: I picked this up out of curiosity when my mom was reading it, and honestly could not put it down. If you're interested in historical Japan, this is a must-read book.
10. The Winter Palace by Eva Stachniak: In truth, I didn't love this book, but it's a great introduction to Russian History for those who, unlike me, aren't addicted to historical biographies.
So where you will travel this summer, either by book or by road.... or even by map? ;)
Tuesday, 12 May 2015
Top Ten Tuesday: Authors I Want to Meet
This week's Top Ten Tuesday topic is about authors that we'd like to meet. This is a bit difficult for me. For starters, a lot of my favourite authors are long dead, and I'm guessing this is more about people I could feasibly meet. As well, I tend to be hesitant about meeting people I admire, because what if they're nothing like I imagine? What if they're jerks? I did my best though, so here are ten living authors that I'd like to meet one day.
1. J.K. Rowling: I can talk Harry Potter until the cows come home.
2. Rainbow Rowell: I'm actually kicking myself because she actually came to town last year and I missed it. Maybe next time...
3. Margaret Atwood: In truth, I've met Atwood twice and have signed copies of The Handmaid's Tale and The Blind Assassin. However, in an ideal world, I'd like to really talk to her about her life and experiences.
4. Donna Tartt: The Secret History was kind of mind-blowing, and I'd like to see how her mind works.
5. David Bezmozgis: Like Atwood, he actually lives in my city, so I always imagine I could run into him at bookish events. I'd like to hear more about his life story.
6. Gillian Flynn: I'm curious as to whether she is as dark in person as her books are!
7. Joseph Boyden: I've been on a Boyden kick lately, and I think he'd have interesting things to say.
8. Alexander McCall Smith: Because he rights the most interesting and hilarious characters.
9. Neil Gaiman: I've only read one of his books, but he seems like the kind of person you want to meet.
10. Ann M. Martin: I did meet her once at a book signing when I was 11, but it would be fun to have a chat with the woman who dreamed up the Baby-Sitters Club and gave me hours upon hours of enjoyment as a preteen!
I'm really interested to see who is on other people's lists!
1. J.K. Rowling: I can talk Harry Potter until the cows come home.
2. Rainbow Rowell: I'm actually kicking myself because she actually came to town last year and I missed it. Maybe next time...
3. Margaret Atwood: In truth, I've met Atwood twice and have signed copies of The Handmaid's Tale and The Blind Assassin. However, in an ideal world, I'd like to really talk to her about her life and experiences.
4. Donna Tartt: The Secret History was kind of mind-blowing, and I'd like to see how her mind works.
5. David Bezmozgis: Like Atwood, he actually lives in my city, so I always imagine I could run into him at bookish events. I'd like to hear more about his life story.
6. Gillian Flynn: I'm curious as to whether she is as dark in person as her books are!
7. Joseph Boyden: I've been on a Boyden kick lately, and I think he'd have interesting things to say.
8. Alexander McCall Smith: Because he rights the most interesting and hilarious characters.
9. Neil Gaiman: I've only read one of his books, but he seems like the kind of person you want to meet.
10. Ann M. Martin: I did meet her once at a book signing when I was 11, but it would be fun to have a chat with the woman who dreamed up the Baby-Sitters Club and gave me hours upon hours of enjoyment as a preteen!
I'm really interested to see who is on other people's lists!
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