Medical, er, Fridays: We Watch Liverpool

Welcome to Medical Monday Friday!  I'm so late on this link-up, but it's not too late, so here goes.  This month's link up is hosted by Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, and Kristen at Wife M.D.

If there's a theme in my life since getting married, it would probably be REST. I've written about this before, but I was a busy go-getter before I moved here.  Slowing down doesn't seem like what happens in a medical family, but I've realized that I need to slow down, enjoy the moments we have, and take opportunities to just be with my husband. 

Medical life is in-freaking-sane.  Even though I "knew" that going into the journey, I hadn't experienced it.  Since getting back from Dominican Republic a month ago, there has been maybe one day when Gil has not gone into the hospital.  Last weekend, he worked 12 hours on Saturday, and he wasn't even on call.  He definitely needs to learn better self-care, but that's a post for another day...  What I need to do is accept this is how it is for now, and to find ways around it.

One thing we've started doing this past year is watching English Premier League.  My husband has always been a Premiership fan.  Liverpool FC is his one great love, after me of course.  He has been a fan for his entire life.  While I've never followed the EPL with much enthusiasm, I am a big soccer fan, and have hopped on the LFC bandwagon since our marriage.  We don't have a fancy cable package, or any cable at all for that matter, but in the fall, we discovered life-streaming Premiership games online.  In our time zone, most Liverpool games fall in the mornings on a weekend, so that has become "our thing".  We can usually squeeze the game in before Gil has to go to the hospital, and for a few glorious hours, we get to hang out together, drinking our coffee, and enjoying a favourite pass-time. 

To be honest, before I got married, I had different hopes.  I thought we'd be doing fun things over the weekend, like checking out festivals or going on bike rides.  I thought married life would be like my single life, but with a partner.  I've discovered, on the other hand, that married life is a different kind of good than my single days, and that's okay.

I've been pondering this post for the past few days, and yesterday at my Bible study, we studied Mary's anointing of Jesus with the jar of fancy perfume.  On the face of it, this seems like such a strange action.  I don't really like touching people or strong smells, so it's hard for me to imagine this scene without feeling a bit icky.  One of the ladies pointed out, however, that Mary took the opportunity while Jesus was there.  If she'd waited another day to do it, she would have been too late.  She didn't complain that it was a bad time because of all the other people, or because she wasn't in the mood.  She just took her jar, and seized the moment.  How many opportunities do I miss because I'm over-thinking, or wishing I could be doing something else?  Some of these are spiritual opportunities, truths that I glance over because I'm distracted, or openings to serve that I don't even notice, but there are also opportunities in my own home that I am tempted to overlook.  So on weekend mornings, when we can, we watch Liverpool.  I will take and enjoy 90 minutes with my husband when I can get them, and try not to complain that I wish I had more.

Medical Monday: We Need A Break

It's another Medical Monday.  I missed out last month, so this time I'm jumping back in.  This month's link-up is hosted by Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, and MJ at MD School Mrs.

It's been cold and snowy here in Toronto, so I'm looking forward to warmer days.  February has never been a favourite month of mine.  Until I met Gil, Valentine's Day was pretty much a downer, and winter is long here, so it still feels like ages until the spring thaw.  This year has been kicking my butt so far.  We've had more snow that I can remember.  My husband worked overnight on new year's eve, came home sick, and spent the first 10 days of January with the flu (which he lovingly passed on to me).  Then yesterday, Gil was feeling sick AGAIN.  It feels like it's just been one thing after another since before Christmas.

I've been seriously in need of a pick me up and here it is:
We're going to Punta Cana!  Miracle of miracles, after a month of putting off discussion, my husband actually worked out the dates and we booked a trip for the end of the month.

This coming vacation is indicative of one major change in me since getting married.  When I was single, my travels always involved doing stuff:  Museums, bike trips, renting cars and driving around Oahu, I wanted to be make the very most of my travels.

Since I've married into this crazy thing called medicine, I just want to slow down.  All I want is a beach, a good book, a fruity drink, and my husband.  I see him wearing himself down day after day, and I just want him to have a rest.  Do any of you feel the same way?  How has marriage changed your habits and preferences?

Happy February, everyone!  Hope you are all staying warm and dry!

Medical Mondays: Coming Out of the (PCOS) Closet

I missed it last month, but I'm back now to link up with Medical Monday, hosted this month by Jane at From a Doctor's Wife and Emma at Your Doctor's Wife.

Today I'm getting very personal.  I try to avoid anything that brings you into the very centre of our private life, but as this issue is more about me than our marriage, I'm opening up.  In a way, I find writing about my issues is cathartic.  Disclaimer:  I'm trying not to overshare, but if you're freaked out by any mention of "lady issues", you may want to pass on this entry.

At 19 years old, I was diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS).  I had really no idea what that meant, and as these were the days before Google, I accepted the doctor's statement that I shouldn't worry.  She put me on birth control pills to regulate my (barely existent) cycles, and I pretty much put it at the back of my mind.

Fast forward about 11 years.  When I was about to get married, I started researching PCOS, and found lots of scary stories from women who couldn't get pregnant or needed considerable interventions to have children.  (This is probably why most doctors (my hubby included) scorn WebMD and "Dr Google"!)  I became terrified that conceiving would be very difficult for us, but as we had decided to wait a year or two before trying, I again tried not to think about PCOS.

In the past few months, we've stopped using birth control to try to have a child, and my cycles have become more erratic. The last one was a full 6 weeks long.  I am becoming more and more afraid that conceiving naturally is unlikely and interventions are in our future.

PCOS is an endocrine disorder that is thought to affect 5-10% of women of reproductive age.  In layman's terms, your hormones are out of whack, which can cause anovulation (not ovulating) or irregular ovulation, acne, hirsutism AKA "excessive hairiness" (thankfully I don't have that!!), and even insulin resistance which can lead to obesity or diabetes.  I'm kind of angry that no one told me most of this when I was first diagnosed, especially the insulin resistance because it can lead to life-altering diseases.  I've found this to be a common thread in many PCOS women:  Doctors gave them the Pill to "fix things", and only later did they realize that the pills don't actually solve the problem, but only mask the symptoms.

The truth is, we don't really know how many women with PCOS are able to conceive without interventions.  Using Google or searching message boards will skew the results, since people who conceive on their own are less likely to blog or post about their pregnancy journey.  I am likely getting way ahead of myself in freaking out, but I also don't want to be taken unaware.

In the short term, I'm focusing on what I can do NOW to make my body as healthy as possible.  A good diet and regular exercise have been shown to regulate cycles, something I have definitely experienced in the past.  Because of the link between PCOS and insulin-resistance, avoiding sugar and complex carbohydrates can also have a positive link between regulating the hormone issues and increasing overall health.  (Seriously, I have the biggest sweet tooth in town; why did no doctor EVER tell me that sugar is especially bad for those with PCOS??  *Sigh*)  There are women who claim to have "cured" their hormonal imbalances just through diet and exercise.  I don't necessarily believe I can do that, but am definitely open to any change that could have a positive effect on my reproductive health.

If you have PCOS, I'd love to hear your experiences.  Has diet and exercise impacted your symptoms?  Have you had to use Clomid or Metformin to have children?

Medical Mondays: Sometimes There Is No "We"

It's the first Monday of October (already?) and that means it's Medical Monday, hosted this month by Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, and Lisa at Life of Ray Doc's Life.  This time I'm posting about home maintenance as a medical spouse.  It's meant to be taken lightly, and not as a criticism of my very busy husband.

Last weekend, while I was in the throes of gardening, I suddenly thought to myself that home ownership is like a gateway drug. You think it will satisfy you, but it ends up bring more work and stress than you anticipated. For example, about 18 months ago, we were so excited to move into our brand new house. After spending most of adulthood in apartments, dorms, and condos, it was thrilling to have a whole house to ourselves. No more listening to the upstairs neighbour's chihuahua barking or opening three or four doors before being home.  We had space!  We had freedom!

We moved in and it was bliss. Well, that is until we realised that our house had a lawn. Of course, we knew that before, but apparently you need to mow a lawn regularly or it looks terrible and you start finding maintenance flyers stuck in your door on a daily basis. We also discovered that we had no idea how to operate the mower we had bought from the previous owners. Thankfully, my husband's colleague recommended a good lawn service, and we breathed a sign of relief.

This year, Gil had the wonderful suggestion that we should start a garden. He was really excited about this project that we would undertake, but it turns out that by “we”, that meant that he borrowed some books from his secretary and I did all the purchasing, digging, planting, and minimal harvesting. For hours of labour, we seem to have exacted several handfuls of cherry tomatoes and three small onions. Still, I was excited at this new venture and despite the lacklustre results, I'm happy that “we” tried it out.

As soon as the garden was started, Gil decided we needed to begin composting. Luckily, our city provides composters at only a minimal delivery cost. Of course, I postponed ordering one until late summer and it wasn't delivered until two weeks later, but now we can finally get started and will hopefully have great soil for next year's garden.  It turns out, however, that composting is actual work.  You don't just put it on your lawn and dump items into it.  Instead, you need to mix the compost material with leaves, twigs, and plants.  In short, to set up the composted we needed to spend considerable time raking and weeding to get enough for the base of the compost.  And by "we", I mean "me", because Gil was once again at the hospital on a Saturday.

Then something strange happened. Apples emerged on the lovely tree in our yard which last year produced lovely blossoms but no fruit. It would have been wonderful, except that we didn't realise how quickly the apples would ripen and by the time I got around to buying a “fruit-picker”, most of the apples had fallen and begun rotting on our lawn. This is why I found myself on a lovely fall Saturday bending over to pick up rotten apples and deposit them into our brand new composter. To make matters worse, many of the rotting apples were covered in bees. [Gil's comment:  "That's great!  We need to maintain a healthy bee population in the neighbourhood!"]

All this to say: We love our house, but be careful what you wish for. And now I've learned that whenever my doctor husband says “we” should start a project, it probably means I'll be doing most of it!

Medical Mondays: "You mean he works weekends?"

Yesterday was our monthly Medical Monday link-up, and I'm very late, but joining in to the fun a day late.  This month's link up is hosted by by Jane at From a  Doctor's Wife, Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, and Heather at Pretty Strong Medicine.

Today's post is inspired by one of the phrases I hear frequently.  For example, on Friday a colleague asked me about our weekend plans.  I said it would be a quiet weekend because Gil was on-call and he looked at me incredulously:  "Wait?  He has to work weekends?"  It surprises me how many people ask this, as though it is a huge shock and imposition.  I mean, people have heart attacks on weekends and holidays too.  Hospitals never close, so why would doctors work 9-5?

The funny part is that the guy who asked me often works weekends.  Maybe when we have demanding hours, we automatically assume everyone else has it better, even the cardiologists among us?  Who knows.  It's easy to forget how many people work odd hours:  Nurses, police, firefighters, military, customer service, etc.  On top of that, lots of people work from home on their own schedules, and then there are stay-at-home parents who work all the time.  So why does it seem so shocking for a person to have to work over Labour Day?

At any rate, nearly two years in to this Mrs. Doctor gig, I'm pretty used to on-call weekends.  Thankfully I'm an introvert who has lived alone in the past, so I am used to amusing myself.  It's a bit disappointing when the on-call schedule falls over a long weekend, but I can deal with it.  These past few days, I went to the gym, did a lot of reading and treated myself to a marathon viewing of the BBC's Sherlock.  I still feel sad not to have had the chance to enjoy my day off together with my husband, but that's the way it goes with this life.

So friends, how was your long weekend?  Did you do anything fun and exciting?

Medical Mondays: The Dreaded Schedule

It's once again the first Monday of the month, and that mean's it's Medical Monday.  Woohoo!  This month's link-up is hosted by Jane at From a  Doctor's Wife and Emma at Your Doctor's Wife.  We've been enjoying long weekend here in Ontario, if your definition of "enjoying" involves being awakened at 6:30am by pagers going off.

This month I'm talking about the complex issue of scheduling.  It is something I still don't have a handle on, so I hope some other medical folks will chime in and give me advise.

Once upon a time, I boasted of being a luddite.  I didn't need electronic organizers!  I had a wall calendar and a paper organizer.  I loved the feel of a brand new daytimer and enjoyed writing in the dates for the year ahead.

Then I got married to someone who loves technology and is insanely busy.  Even when we were dating, Gil added me onto his online calendar so I could see when he was on-call.  Because of my old-fashioned tendencies, I'd dutifully write his on-call weekends on my paper calendar.  As we eased into married life, however, the paper organizer became less and less useful because I didn't actually have a life to keep track of, and the online calendar became my life-line for keeping track of Gil's crazy days.

Nowadays, apart from a large wall calendar that's partly for show, I've had to give up on my beloved paper.  (You're welcome, trees!) Gil and I use Google Calendars and the Calendars + app to keep tabs on each other.  Since I work shift work and sometimes have evening obligations, it's also important for my husband to know when I'm not going to be around.  Sometimes I "invite" him to a date so he'll know he has to that evening off.  Even with the online calendars, though, life is confusing.  Honestly, I don't know how I will do it once kids come into the equation and we are dealing with doctor and dentist appointments, extra-curricular classes, etc.

Medical families, I'd love to know how you keep track of your busy life.  What methods work and which have been colossal failures?  Inquiring minds want to know!

Medical Monday: Drink Your Fluids (and Happy Canada Day)

Can you believe it's July already?  That means it's time for the next installment of the Medical Mondays blog hop, hosted this month by Medical Mondays blog hop, hosted by Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, Heather at Army Wife, Army Life, and Cyndy at Putting the Fun in Dysfunctional.  If you're now around here, welcome!

More importantly, however, it's Canada's birthday, so without further ado, here are some photos of Canadian things (though unfortunately I have no pics of poutine or maple syrup):

Seriously, though, on to some medical thoughts.  The past few Medical Mondays, I've written  lighthearted posts about the life of a doctor's family.  Today, however, I'm going to share a snippet of medical advice that I unfortunately neglected recently and that is pertinent in this week of both Canada's and America's birthdays.

Friends, please don't forget to drink your fluids!

Last Wednesday, I had a lovely morning of walking around on Danforth Avenue, sampling a new (to me) cafe and reveling in the sunshine.  I spent the afternoon at home and, after picking up my car from the repair shop, went to exercise class at church.  I woke up on Thursday morning with possibly the worst headache I've ever known.  My whole body felt achy and my stomach hurt after eating.  Of course, I thought I was dying, but my husband thought I was dehydrated.

What gives?  I drink water at all my meals and during exercise, so how could I be dehydrated?  I neglected to take into account the exercise and the sunshine, and in all honesty, I probably don't drink enough water to begin with.  I stupidly thought that I would know when I was getting dehydrated.  Wouldn't I get really thirsty first?  I thought dehydration just happened to people who got lost in the wilderness without enough drinking water, or people who did excessive exercise in hot weather. Wrong.  Anyone can get dehydrated, and in the hot summer months, we're all more vulnerable to heatstroke and dehydration.

So friends, while you're out enjoying barbecues, fireworks, and parties at this festive time of year, don't forget to put a few bottles of water in your bag for you and your kids.  Don't wait until you feel thirsty to get a drink of water.  Don't get your fluids from coffee or alcohol, which don't actually hydrate you.  Take it seriously if you feel tired, dizzy, or lightheaded.  And don't forget that your pets may need more water in the hot weather as well.

Oh yeah, and Happy Canada Day!

Embarrassing photo from my 27th birthday scavenger hunt

Medical Metaphors (and Similes)

 **Hi friends! Today I'm participating in the Medical Mondays blog hop, hosted by Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, and Amber at The Unconventional Doctor's Wife. If you're now around here, welcome! Regular readers, please take the opportunity of checking out some other interesting blogs.** 

This month's post is dedicated to the art of the metaphor.  In case you've forgotten what you learned in English class, similes and metaphors are when you compare two things based on a common feature, for example, "slippery as an eel".  I could go on, but this is Medical Monday, not Vocabulary Monday.

There are a lot of metaphors we use regularly in our daily life; however, when someone is in a specialized field, they may use comparisons that those outside the field would never think up or even understand.  This isn't limited to doctors; when I was in grad school, I remember telling my Bible study group that my thesis was going well:  "I set weekly goals for myself and have been exceeding my goals...  [chuckle]  Wow, I sound like a Stalinist planned economy."  Cue blank stare from those who had not spent years studying twentieth century Eastern Europe.

Doctors and other medical professionals have such a large arsenal of specialized vocabulary and experience that gives them a whole new realm of metaphoric potential.  Here are a couple of zingers that Gil has come up with:

--"Why are you jumping around like that?  You look like you have tardive dyskinesia."  [I was fidgeting while standing in the kitchen.]

--[When the drain of the basket on the coffee maker was clogged.]  "The coffee is dripping out so slowly.  It's like urination when you have an enlarged prostrate."

Most of the time, I double over laughing at these weird comparisons and when I've composed myself, ask for an explanation.  The bonus part is that that these similes are both a source of amusement and an educational tool; I now know that tardive dyskinesia is "a disorder resulting in involuntary, repetitive body movements", which commonly occurs after long-term and/or high-dose drug use [Source:  Wikipedia].  More importantly, I know that tardive is a word I can use in Scrabble.  :-)

Medical readers, have you or your spouse ever used a weird metaphor, to the general amusement or confusion of others?  Please feel free to share!

Medical Mondays: Things Doctors Do Differently

 **Hi friends! Today I'm participating in the Medical Mondays blog hop, hosted by Emma at Your Doctor's Wife, Jane at From a Doctor's Wife, Erin at Home With the Boys, and Heather at The Life Unexpected. If you're now around here, welcome! Regular readers, please take the opportunity of checking out some other interesting blogs.**

Last time I joined in for Medical Monday, I was feeling a bit down and posted some really honest musings. This time I'm lightening things up a bit. These are a few things I've noticed that doctors experience differently than “regular folks”.

Watching TV:  Television seems to bring out the “doctor” in my doctor husband. Medical shows are the worst of this, of course. It's a good thing I've never been a Grey's Anatomy fan, because Gil can't watch two minutes of it without lecturing the TV. We watched a couple of episodes of The Mob Doctor, with the same result. (Actually, I was also yelling at the TV for that one. How can she just leave the hospital and drive to the middle of nowhere all the time without anyone noticing? ...but I digress.) Medical Drama Syndrome, however, is not limited to hospital-set shows. I've seen it occur during crime fighting programs (usually brought on by autopsies), and even food programs. The other day we watched an episode of Bizarre Foods in which the host visited a Singapore restaurant specializing in using food to restore customers' “yin” and “yang” balance. I think my husband's head nearly exploded. :-)

Making plans:  Since I'm the “secretary” of our relationship, I generally liaise with others trying to get together with us. Any accepted invitation usually follows several back-and-forth negotiations (“He's on call that weekend... and that one too... and he's post-call on that day, so that's a no...”), and is annotated with, “But of course, he may be called in and not be able to come.” A few weeks ago, we had friends over for dinner and a hockey game, and Gil did not arrive home until they'd gone home. Ah, the medical life!

Attending family gatherings:  Most people's family Christmas party include discussion of Auntie Gertrude's recent trip to Ireland (accompanied by 2 full photo albums), the weather, politics, and polite chatter. When doctors attend family gatherings, they are immediately pounced upon by Uncle Philbert who wants to discuss his recent colonoscopy results, and Cousin Euphemia who has a strange rash. Then there is the random relative who just can't wait to corner any medical person with the latest theories on how cancer is a government plot, and the entire medical profession is a money-grabbing scam. And of course all of that information must be true because he found it on the Internet...

Attending conferences: In my previous life, I attended a grand total of one conference.  I flew overseas, had an extra day to get over jet lag and sightsee, then attended two days of meetings, complete with catered lunches, breaks, and a very fancy dinner (the kind with separate wines for each course).  Due to the cross-Atlantic travel, I missed a full week of work even though it was only a two-day conference.  Since this was such a cool experience, I couldn't wait to attend conferences with my husband, but it turns out that they aren't much fun, and usually involve me barely seeing him at all because of breakfast meetings and evening sessions.  This winter we attended a conference at Mont Tremblant and he literally did not leave the hotel for two days.  (I, on the other hand, went snowshoeing and had a grand old time.)  Gil insists that this is the norm because he needs to rack up his training hours.  I'm guessing he'll need to retire to finally get some real R&R.
 

Medical friends, can you think of anything to add?